Avoid Family Feuds: Essential Steps for a Well-Planned Will
Imagine your family has a priceless heirloom, a beautiful diamond ring that’s been in the family for generations. It’s stunning and valuable. The siblings all know about it and the oldest child assumes they are inheriting it. The only problem is mom never told anyone in the family her plans for the ring, and the ring was never mentioned in the will. You now have all the ingredients for a family feud.
A detailed will is always a smart financial move. It ensures your wealth is distributed how you wish, whether it’s to surviving family members, a favorite charity, or cherished institution. It also frees loved ones to process their grief, and not focus on stressful financial arguments.
A thoughtful will can also avoid family drama — and costly litigation — over how the wealth is shared. It can be especially important in blended families with a second spouse and stepchildren. Avoiding painful conflict may be even more valuable than the wealth itself.
Planning won’t remove all of the risks of family feuds or litigation, but a thoughtful plan tailored to your situation makes a better outcome much more likely. Here are five things you should do when you craft your will to anticipate and lessen family tensions.
1. Be clear
Do you want to leave someone a specific gift? Provide detailed instructions and set a timeline. Avoid ambiguous words like “contents” or “valuables” and get right to the point. For example, you may intend to give your oldest son the family car. If you don’t specify these intentions within the will, another family member may think the car should be sold as part of the estate. By stating the intention precisely, you ensure your wishes are carried out and reduces the likelihood of lawsuits or animosity.
2. Put the right people and institutions in charge
This is absolutely critical. Make sure the person you appoint as executor is in tune with your wishes and doesn’t have a personal agenda. For instance, if the executor lives in a home that would be sold as part of the estate, they may try to delay the sale. This may be perceived as unfair to the other family members and create conflict and hostility. Working with a bank or fiduciary outside your family will provide objective, unbiased counsel.
3. Know the friction points
Family members can be emotionally attached to items such as an antique desk, a vacation home, or a special piece of art. If possible, talk with your loved ones about what you plan to leave them. If you state your wishes directly, there’s no room for misunderstanding and the assets can be thoughtfully and efficiently distributed.
4. Anticipate and prepare for creditor claims
Make sure you hold out assets to pay for estate taxes and other outstanding debt. Typically, creditors are paid before survivors receive benefits and beneficiaries are not always aware of this.
5. Avoid the procrastination trap
According to AARP, 64% of Americans don’t have a will at all. If it seems overwhelming, seek a fiduciary like First Financial Bank. Fiduciaries provide objectivity through a sensitive topic. At a large, respected institution, you can also trust that the organization and staff will have competency and continuity to be ready to support your family, even if the will isn’t needed for years.
Remember: A will isn’t just about finances. By planning ahead and following the recommendations above, you can pass down the greatest legacy possible – peace and harmony among your loved ones.
